A MUM has posted a brutally sincere itemizing for her £100 “f***ing monstrosity” of a caravan on Fb Market.
Katie Perkins branded her 27-year-old caravan a “hunk of junk” and a “tin shed on wheels”.
The 35-year-old didn’t maintain again as she reeled off a prolonged checklist of faults for the “historical” caravan which she claims she would commerce for £100 – or two bottles of purple wine.
Katie, of Glastonbury, Somerset, posted on Fb: “It’s not pristine, it isn’t fairly, it’s a tin shed on wheels, it’s f***** sizzling in the summertime, it’s f****** freezing within the winter, it even grows icicles on the within.
“It might do with a full alternative of carpets. It wants bleach clear all through.
“It has a s*** oven, it has a s*** hob, it has a s*** fridge.”
Katie’s household lived within the caravan for seven years whereas constructing their “dream residence” – however Katie says their plans “was a f***** nightmare.”
The fed-up mum even issued a being pregnant warning with the tiny caravan after her household grew from 4 to seven whereas dwelling there.
She added: “Children have been potty skilled in it. Canine was potty skilled in it.
“It has been used for storage for the final 9 months. Subsequent cease, the f****** chickens are getting into it.
“Beds have been destroyed and I can’t be f****** to take away.
“I’m positive if you’re it you need to use it for one thing, I don’t give a f*** what.”
On the brilliant facet, Katie admits the caravan comes with a “fairly first rate microwave” and has extras together with outdated footwear, summary artwork drawings by her kids and outdated bottles of booze beneath the sink.
In a remaining foul-mouthed flourish, Katie says she’d settle for little or no to get the “hunk of junk” out of her life.
She says: “F*** it – if you happen to actually need this f****** monstrosity then I’ll commerce it for a pair bins of hubby’s favorite purple wine – Jammy Crimson Roo or Jam Shed.
Get this hunk of junk of my f******* land. I’d like to say it’s f****** stunning however I’d be mendacity.
“I’d like to say I beloved dwelling in it, however I’d be mendacity.
“I’d like to say I’d look ahead to a caravan vacation, however guess what?…I’d be mendacity.
“The photographs of the within are s*** – get pleasure from.”
Now Katie’s hilarious itemizing has attracted over 1,000 shares and lots of of feedback from social media followers shocked by her honesty.
One admiring fan commented on the put up: “That is the most effective f****** advert ever.”
One other gushed: “Seven years! Yikes, with 5 youngsters. I hope you at the moment are having fun with the stunning new home you constructed.”
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A 3rd social media person was unconvinced by the providing, writing: “Footage are a little bit of a humiliation, desires burning down.”
However Katie merely responded: “I’m mortgage free and personal a six mattress home at 35. So I couldn’t give a flying f*** about you and your opinions.”